- A Decimal Point -> I'm a Dot in Place
- The Morse Code -> Here Come Dots
- Slot Machines -> Cash Lost in 'em
- Alec Guinness -> Genuine Class
- Animosity -> Is No Amity
- Desperation -> A Rope Ends It
- Snooze Alarms -> Alas! No More Z's
- Eleven plus two -> Twelve plus one
- Semolina -> Is No Meal
- The Public Art Galleries -> Large Picture Halls, I Bet
- Dormitory -> Dirty Room
- The Earthquakes -> That Queer Shake
- Contradiction -> Accord not in it
From Shakespeare's Hamlet: "To be or not to be: that is the question, whether tis nobler in the mind to suffer the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune."....becomes....."In one of the Bard's best-thought-of tragedies, our insistent hero, Hamlet, queries on two fronts about how life turns rotten." And finally, from Neil Armstrong, the first man to talk on the moon: "That's one small step for a man, one giant leap for mankind."....becomes...."A thin man ran; makes a large stride; left planet, pins flag on moon! On to Mars!" |
