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Dealing with Telemarketers

Three ways to politely deal with telephone direct sales

We have all experienced our fair share of telephone marketing calls. Their calls are an unwanted intrusions into our lives. And while we’d like to scream at them and make remarks about their mothers, the polite gentleman knows this would be inappropriate.

Therefore we would like to offer three polite ways of dealing with telemarketers:

  1. Try acting like a religious zealot and busily set yourself to trying to convert the telemarketer your new religious cult. Make sure your cult somehow involves dingos and flapjacks. That should definitely send them scurrying.
  2. Pretending to be hard of hearing can often send the phone solicitor on their way. Try screaming "Ehhhhhh?" at the top of your lungs every time they ask you a question. If the deaf angle seems too obvious try pretending to have amnesia. First agree to buy whatever product they are selling. Then when they ask for your credit card number, ask them why they want it as if you have absolutely no clue what they are talking about. Do this repeatedly.
  3. Another suggestion is to pretend to listen intently to their sale pitch, whatever it may be. Go through the process of signing up for anything and everything possible. When the telemarketer finally tells you what you owe and asks you for your credit card number, explain that you’re a little hard up for cash. Then try to borrow money from the telemarketer. Promise over and over that you’re good for the money. This will surely put you on their ‘do not call’ list.
their ‘do not call’ list.

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