Enter the stall. Shower for about 3 minutes, then scream really loudly,
exclaiming, "I didn''t know I had one of THOSE!"
Ask Scottie to beam you up.
Enter the cubicle, undress and then re-dress up as Superman. Leap out of
the stall, vengefully vow to stop Lex Luthor''s evil plot, then run full force
into the wall.
Bring a bottle of fake blood or ketchup into the shower with you. Exclaim
"Ow, you know, it really hurts when you pop one of those." Then
let the blood/ketchup seep down the drain for all to see.
Look over the edge to the person showering next to you, giggle, and then
return to your side, whistling the tune "It''s a Small World After All."
Have a seizure. Bang against the walls of the stall really hard. Try to
knock them down. If anyone later asks if you are okay, just say that you had
some Mexican Jumping Fava Beans and they were reacting negatively with your
Initiate a war with the person in the stall next to you. Use the residue
water on the floor as your battle medium, and float litte battleships over
to their side. If they kick them back or throw them over the edge, exclaim
that you didn''t know they had the power of God and sheepishly mumble prayers
for the duration of your shower.
Bang your head against the stall wall, shouting "Redrum! Redrum!"
in your best groggy voice.
Before you turn the shower on, make a noise like you are charging up a
proton pack from Ghostbusters. Before you turn it off, ask Egon to set the
trap up for you.
Bring a balloon into the shower. Make the balloon squeak for the duration
of your bathing experience. Then pop it, and fall to the ground.
Bring dead fish into the shower with you. Let them float down the drainage
"ditch", complaining about the quality of water these days.
Hang up the names of different farm animals in the stalls. Have everyone
entering the stalls join you in a rendition of "Old McDonald Had A Farm",
making the sound of their animal in the stall.
Take your shower like normal, and then begin screaming that the Communists
are taking over. Bang battle sounds, including bombs, bazookas, and tanks.
Towards the end, wearily declare victory. Leave wounded.
Levitate. If anyone complains, tell them that they are breaking your concentration
and just because they have bad karma doesn''t give them the right to spread
Blow bubbles. Exclaim that you are dissolving.
Do your best impression of the sound track of the ''Shower Scene'' from Psycho.
Coat the floor in a fine layer of quick-drying cement.
Bring in Sesame Street bath books. Read them aloud. Giggle everytime Bert
walks in on Ernie bathing.
Hook up your shower-heads to a local dairy-farm. If anyone complains about
the washing facilities, tell them that they should be thankful for a wholesome,
pasturized, vitamins A & D fortified wash. Call them ingrates.
Put an electric eel in the water heater. Laugh everytime someone gets a
shock. Call them glowworms.
e someone gets a
shock. Call them glowworms.