| Competitive salary: We remain competitive by paying less than our competitors. Join our fast-paced company: We have no time to train you. Casual work atmosphere: We don't pay you enough to expect that you'll dress nicely. Must be deadline oriented: You'll be six months behind schedule on your first day. Must be flexible: On many occasions, you'll be asked to bend over and grab your ankles. Some overtime required: Some time each night and some time each weekend. Duties will vary: Anyone in the office can boss you around. Must have an eye for detail: We have no quality control. Career-minded: Female employees must be childless (and remain that way). Apply in person: If you're old, fat or ugly you'll be told the position has been filled. No phone calls please: We've filled the job; our call for resumes is just a legal formality. Seeking candiates with a wide variety of experience: You'll need it to replace the three people who just left. Problem-solving a must: You're walking into a company in perpetual chaos. Requires team leadership skills: You'll have the responsibilities of a manager, without the pay or respect. |
