Competitive salary: We remain competitive by paying less
than our competitors.
Join our fast-paced company: We have no time to train
Casual work atmosphere: We don''t pay you enough to expect
that you''ll dress nicely.
Must be deadline oriented: You''ll be six months behind
schedule on your first day.
Must be flexible: On many occasions, you''ll be asked to
bend over and grab your ankles.
Some overtime required: Some time each night and some
time each weekend.
Duties will vary: Anyone in the office can boss you around.
Must have an eye for detail: We have no quality control.
Career-minded: Female employees must be childless (and
remain that way).
Apply in person: If you''re old, fat or ugly you''ll be
told the position has been filled.
No phone calls please: We''ve filled the job; our call
for resumes is just a legal formality.
Seeking candiates with a wide variety of experience: You''ll
need it to replace the three people who just left.
Problem-solving a must: You''re walking into a company
in perpetual chaos.
Requires team leadership skills: You''ll have the responsibilities
of a manager, without the pay or respect.