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Thoughts About Marriage

Thoughts and quotes about the wonderful world of dating and marraige. Married men and women everywhere should read this.

Quotes on Marriage

Marriage has many pains, but celibacy has no pleasures
Samuel Johnson

Marriage has no guarantees. If that''s what you''re looking for, go live with a car battery
Erma Bombeck

The trouble with some women is that they get all excited about nothing -- and then marry him.

A few thoughts about getting married

  • I''ve sometimes thought about marrying... and then I''ve thought again.
  • A little girl asked her father, "Daddy, how much does it cost to get married?" And the father replied, "I don''t know, I''m still paying."
  • Marriage is the triumph of imagination over intelligence.
  • If a man steals your wife, there is no better revenge than to let him keep her.
  • After marriage, husband and wife become two sides of a coin; they just can''t face each other, but still they stay together.
  • Marriage is a three ring circus: engagement ring, wedding ring, and suffering.
  • Marriage is not a word; it is a sentence.
  • Man is incomplete until he is married. Then he is finished.
  • Before marriage, a man yearns for the woman he loves. After marriage, the ''Y'' becomes silent.
  • Second marriage is the triumph of hope over experience.
  • Marriage is when a man and woman become as one; the trouble starts when they try to decide which one.
  • Marriage is like a cage; one sees the birds outside desperate to get in, and those inside desperate to get out.
  • If you want your wife to listen carefully to everything you say, try talking in your sleep.
  • If marriage was outlawed, only outlaws would have in-laws.
  • My girlfriend told me I should be more affectionate. So I got two girlfriends.
  • How do most men define marriage? A very expensive way to getting their laundry done free.
  • Getting married is very much like going to a restaurant with friends. You order what you want, then when you see what the other person has, you wish you had ordered that.

Questions about Weddings

Q: Is it OK to bring a date to the wedding reception?
A: Not if you are the groom.

Q: What kind of music is recommended for the wedding ceremony?
A: Anything except ''I''m a Little Teapot''.

Q: What is a wedding tragedy?
A: To marry a man for love, and then find out he has no money.

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